My previous life basically involved getting up going to work, gym then home. Same routine different days social aspects were a lot of bar drinking and night clubs. I had a lot of interests in doing sports but the truth is facilities are expensive and full a lot of the time near where i lived so generally didnt go. My previous relationship was over after 11 years and after finding that i hated the life i had and the fact i hadnt achieved anything i wanted due to “settling down” and slipping into the way my ex wanted to do life i was really living my hell. I had been active all my life and slowly that had been whittled away to nothing. My now ex had her hobbies and the fact the bills were all covered by me left the issue that quite simply we had little financial space to manouver and she was content she had what “she wanted” her horses, a house and part-time work where i was working 10 – 16 hrs a day and covering call outs evenings and weekends. We argued a lot and pretty much it wasnt worth living. The had been something happen in our life which changed everything a 2am meeting my ex had with someone she worked with. Im not being clinical but i have issues with sex partners if they ever had sex with someone else while in a relationship quite simply i cant have sex with them again. Quite simply i no longer see the person that was once my partner. In a nutshell its over.
Well the ending was the beginning of my new life. I felt guilty because of leaving not because of my ex but because we have a daughter together and anyone who knows me will tell you i love kids and the effects on her hit me pretty hard. But i justified the fact that now there was no arguing and my financial freedoms were back i can rebuild a better life for everyone. I cut my life back to the bone financial freedom originally come at a cost a lot of arguements over cancelling phonelines, satellite TV, TV license, insurance, etc etc. But the truth is i had paid everything for years and now i cut free i wanted my life. To many people go through life giving in for an easy life there is no such thing. If your giving an inch youve already given a mile and it wont change because your ex or soon to be will know she can bully you or blackmail. You just have to say to hell with it and throw everything in the air and wait for things to fall into place.
I moved in with a friend of mine for a while and eventually moved from there back to my parents i wanted to maximise my income. Career changes happend i went from an Engineer to a contracts manager and started to see my salary increase over time. I did go through a bad patch with a Filipina who seemed either mentally unstable or just trying to rob me blind either way im glad thats over. Then I was editing a profile for a friend of mine who was struggling on a dating site and a photo appeared of a beautiful woman. I sent her an email via my friends account asking her to email me and gave my email account. She nearly got banned. But soon enough she gave me a yahoo and i had waited a few days in my spare time for it to appear on my list then on day 3 her yahoo appeared and we started chatting and have spoken everyday since. We had a few major things happen in our life that drew us closer together the facts are private and i may right something on this time in years to come. But i flew out September 2007 to meet April for the first time didnt know what to expect and had just decided you only live once hopped on a plane and that was it.
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very step of the journey we kept in touch. “Hi my love im in London”, “Doha”, waiting at immigration. Then as i headed to the exit doors of the airport i seen around 60 taxi drivers touting for business and on the other side of the road maybe 100+ people waiting for relatives. I looked around couldnt see April she had told me she was near the vending machine but i couldnt even see the machine. I turned to the left where it was quiet and texted “Where are you?” and my location. A reply came back “ive seen you” and as i looked over to the other side of the road a beaming smile i had seen on the internet shined through the crowd if its something to go by i seen my now wife through at least 100 people instantly. The same thing happend to both of us we were more than happy to meet each other for the first time. April was pretty much speechless and after cutting through the crowd there was a group of relatives to meet me. An aunt,uncle and cousins we headed off to a Pizza restaurant to eat as our first port of call. The strange thing in meeting for the first time and it occured to me as we sat in the restaurant it was like we had been together our whole lives. We sat together and things were like a couple that had been married for years. Both happy to finally meet each other but most importantly content with each other first signs of love had already started to rise.
We headed over to the family compound in the back of uncle Jimmys multicab which was a bit uncomfortable due to my height. But my mind was somewhere else and i was surprised and honoured so many people made the effort to come and meet me it was unexpected. I met more relatives at the compound and then we headed off to the hotel as it was getting late. April had found a resort not far from the compound and as April was still working it gave us a bit of space but also anything April needed for work the next two weeks were amazing we spent as much time as possible together and if April was at work we 
texted constantly. Jovie Aprils sister was my guide for the 2 weeks and took me to all the local malls etc. Im proud to have such a kind hearted and beautiful sister inlaw and just want to say thank you for that time. Work got in the way a bit and April was pretty much tired during the week so i setup a special meal. I went out bought Crystal glasses, candles the works and set it all up in hotel room as a surprise. Problem is i didnt know the area well for food and it ended up that we had Jollibee take out for the actual meal with a bottle of wine. But as it was all a surprise it went well and was one of the best times we had together. Very simple but its what you do that counts. We are just happy around each other and many people have said how good we look together because quite simply we are happy making the other happy which makes us both content in life.
We had already travelled to Manila and back to get the paperwork processed at the British Embassy and I would like to that Aprils aunt for picking us up at the airport and letting us stay at her house hope we will visit again sometime soon. The two weeks we had together come and went too soon and leaving April at the airport to head back to the UK was one of the hardest things ive ever had to face in my life. My heart was in the pit of my stomach by the time i had reached Heathrow and by the time i had returned to Birmingham on the national express bus i was already planning my next trip. Within a few weeks i was back in the Philippines had quit my job and we got married. Its one of the most important decisions ive made in my life and also one of the happiest and proudest moments. I gained a beautiful, intelligent, loving and caring wife and my new life had begun.
The months we had over the winter of 2007 (if you can call it winter its the tropics!) were amazing and i got to see Christmas and New Year Philippines style which is very simple but gives the real meaning of things which have been lost in the West . The Christmas is to do about thanks to others and giving away gifts to others less fortunate and New year the fireworks were simple but they were more fun than the UK due to the majority of them unlikely to pass safety requirements in the UK either.
It was during this time we started to make plans for our future and thats where we currently are. We bought our lots, some pigs, a scooter, a multicab pickup and thats where we currently are in life. Im working in the UK for 4 months at a time as we build the house and piggery up. Hopefully within a year or two will be able to stay in the Philippines with my family for good only coming back to make some money for expansion.
I dont suffer with stress, im content, happy, have a loving wife and looking forward to a bright future in a place i call home “CEBU, PHILIPPINES”. Life is too short to sit and hope its going to get better you need to make it happen and make it happen today. You dont have to have a lot of money (but it helps) the main things is doing it early so you can start developing a future.
I would like to thank my wife for putting up with me. I know im a bit of a nightmare sometimes and i know i make you worry a lot more than i should(4 Scooter accidents involving no brakes and refusing to goto hospital with Dengue are all recent events aswell as the multicab going into a full skid and ending up on the wrong side of the road but thats another story). But i love you and missing you lots take care of Zoei for me and ill be home for Christmas.
After my recent illness its become a bit of a crusade to try and encourage others to do a bit for each other. Ive known people needing 13 blood transfusions to rid the body of dengue and this got me thinking, i never gave blood before. Why? Well simply i have a phobia of needles, a pretty bad phobia but ive had to have several blood tests since i got sick and although the thought of the needle made me feel worse than the actual needle ive decided once ive been given the all clear to start doing my bit for blood donation not because i needed it but the possibility that i could have and the fact that a lot of people would have given blood and time to save my life. So im asking you to do what im about to start doing and thats to give blood at least once. Im hopefully going to be a regular the reasons being i want to help save lives. The other bonus to this type of system is you are given credits (someone may correct me on this) so that if you needed blood in the future you have already given X amount so in return you will be given “free blood” for the stuff you have given otherwise you have to pay.
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